I sat on the very last padded pew in the Stake Center for the evening session of stake conference. And wouldn't you know it -- a newly-wed couple (at least I HOPE they were newlyweds) sat right in front of me. She nibbled his ear as the meeting started, and then sat on his lap . . .
This initially annoyed the potash out of me, especially since I couldn't see the speakers -- but then I thought to myself wistfully "Was I ever that young and so much in love? Yeah, I guess I was." So blessings on that young couple -- may they feel that same passion 20 years from now . . .
I got there early so I could get the seat I wanted, and as I gazed repeatedly at the clock on the chapel wall I was suddenly struck with the question: Why do we have clocks in our chapels? Do other denominations have wall clocks in their chapels as prominent as ours? I bet not. I know that the Roman Catholic church I went to as a child did not have a timepiece anywhere in the church that I could ever see -- and I looked assiduously for one, since the priest said the whole Mass in Latin and time seemed to stand still for a little boy who hated cold wooden seats . . .
Howsomever, the first hour of the meeting was refreshingly different from any I have attended before. Instead of a string of speakers, one of the Ward Councils got up in front of everyone and we were allowed to ask them questions about what they did. And then a family, mother, father, and kids, were lined up in front of the congregation, and talked about their experiences holding family scripture study, and again the audience was allowed to toss questions at them about their experiences.
I couldn't help wondering how something like that would go over in Thailand. Would a Thai Ward Council be willing to stand in front of others, almost like a military review, and answer questions that might be construed as a veiled criticism or a questioning of their actions? It would be so easy for them to feel like they had 'lost face'. I also wonder if any Thai family would be willing to stand in front of a church audience and get the third degree about how they conducted their affairs. I think not. The father would remain silent; the mother would cry; and the kids would silently grin and shuffle their feet like idiots. But maybe they are already doing these things there now -- it seems to be a Church-wide policy to have Q & A sessions and group discussions at bigger meetings nowadays.
The General Authority presiding ended the meeting by stating that if each individual didn't come away from the meeting determined to start doing something, or stop doing something, then we had wasted out time attending. Those kinds of dogmatic statements always make me irritable and depressed, because most of the time I do not get much of a spiritual charge from meetings -- especially Stake meetings. This particular meeting did not inspire me to change anything, so I must be spiritually anemic . . .
I may have mentioned it before, but I really try to rein in my urgent sense of having to change things RIGHT NOW. I used to get that feeling all the time, especially on my mission -- and it usually led to problems.
I recall once being on a visa run with my companion Elder Heier -- we and about half of all the missionaries had to take the train from Bangkok down to Butterworth in Malaysia. It was a long boring trip, and I got one of my anxiety attacks and felt we HAD TO DO SOMETHING instead of just sitting there enjoying the scenery. So I proposed to Elder Heier that we go into the private train cars and knock on each door to do a little proselyting. We managed to go through one whole train car, getting the doors slammed in our faces by mostly very drunk and annoyed Australians, until one of them finally complained to the conductor about us. They stopped the train and were going to throw all of us missionaries off, but the AP's did some fast talking and convinced the train staff we would behave ourselves for the rest of the trip -- and Elder Heier and I were given strict orders to MIND OUR OWN BUSINESS from then on. Which we did.
So as I walked home from Stake Conference, revolving in my mind, what I could do differently, it suddenly came to me that, yes, my daughter Sarah had called me earlier in the day to say that my ex-wife's father had just passed away, and then she gave me Amy's phone number and said I could call her sometime. Hah! I would call her tonight -- that would be what I would change -- I would resume communications with the ex!
But now as I write this I realize that it is another one of my famous bad ideas. She doesn't want to hear from me right now -- her dad grew to HATE me, even before the divorce. So I'll let her bury him next to his wife up in Tioga, North Dakota this coming week, and then in another week or so I'll give her a call to say I'm sorry about her dad and ask if there is anything I can do for her and leave it at that. Not romantic; not exciting; not extraordinary. Just cautious common sense -- something I have so little of still that I am amazed when I can conjure it up at all . . . .
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RESPONSE FROM A FRIEND IN TAIWAN:
Tim Tim Tim
You make excellent observations. I especially like the one about clocks!
It makes me wonder if the Savior had a stop watch going during his sermon on the mount! Must finish on time to make it to the next teaching appointment!
I am finding that the HASTENING THE WORK means RUSHING OFF TO THE NEXT MEETING which is beginning to drive me nuts!
I fear that the church management is so busy hastening the work that the work is being forgotten! Something better be done about this if they want to keep good people around. Men are that they might have joy!? Sorry, no time for joy! That would require time to enjoy God's creations and actually get to know other people, and if we did that here, you would miss the next meeting which you're already late for!!!! Don't stop to smell the roses! No time for that!
Just last night the first My Path fireside was held in Taiwan. Excellent material and all. However, it became clear that rushing thru the material leaves 50% of the people lost! Much of it is beyond their ability to comprehend! And it doesn't help when the Stake President, a veteran CES guy does not follow the plan but shoots from the hip and embellishes reality to make it appear that Steve Jobs and Jack Ma were working with the Prophet to develop the initiative for use with the church. I was a bit depressed after the 105 minute workshop ended. But hey! It's priesthood led so it must have been inspired! Pffff!
I'm off to Ching Foo for a night to give this fireside on Tuesday. Smaller group but hope it goes better.
I enjoy hearing your experiences in Mormon Mecca. It tells me a lot about how many worlds apart we are when it comes to Church experiences. The Western mind is in full control and it's layed on thick and rich here. And they'll continue to wonder why retention is so poor and home teaching almost non-extant here. Someday someone will realize that Taipei is not Provo. Until then, we prepare to hear the Apostles voice in two weeks! Should be interesting!
Good luck with Amy!
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