The Dollar

From the Wall Street Journal:  "As the yuan tumbled during the past few weeks, Chinese consumers have been scrambling to change the currency for U.S. dollars, causing cash shortages at some mainland banks."

Whenever countries find themselves in economic holes

they scramble for our greenbacks as if selling off their souls.

Say what you will, America has money in the bank --

our dollars are reliable, and not some foolish crank.

My bosom swells with pride when I do gaze upon the scene

of dollars holding up the world, from Greece to Aberdeen.

The mighty dollar is supreme -- so please to never knock it.

(I only wish I had a few to line my threadbare pocket!)

House passes Chaffetz bill to slash allowance for ex-presidents

From the Salt Lake Tribune:

"Former U.S. presidents who leave the White House to find a new, lucrative career on the speaking circuit, with best-selling books and in the corporate boardroom could see their taxpayer-funded allowance slashed under legislation by Rep. Jason Chaffetz that was approved Monday by the House.

Former presidents now earn a $200,000 annual salary — half of what they received in the White House — and an additional $200,000 allowance for setting up an office and other related costs."

Pity the poor president who's out of office, broke;

for him the daily struggle is most surely not a joke.

Wrapped in rags of cashmere to keep out the searching cold,

the Leader of the Free World has no longer any gold.

He panhandles at lectures, scribbles books for meager gains;

and all he gets is autograph requests for all his pains.

A humble little pension, a small stipend hardly bears

the cost of his loyal broker who invests in common shares.

Oh cruel Chaffetz, cannot you not relent and show some pity?

Let the grateful taxpayers feed the White House kitty!

We don't mind the cost of giving them a fountain pen;

as long as they behave themselves and do not run again.

The circus has no elephants

The Cops Know all About You

From the Washington Post:  

FRESNO, Calif. — "While officers raced to a recent 911 call about a man threatening his ex-girlfriend, a police operator in headquarters consulted software that scored the suspect’s potential for violence the way a bank might run a credit report.

The program scoured billions of data points, including arrest reports, property records, commercial databases, deep Web searches and the man’s social- media postings. It calculated his threat level as the highest of three color-coded scores: a bright red warning."

The cops know all about you when they pull you over, pal;

whether you wear dentures or have had a root canal.

Before they write the ticket they have scanned your records back

to your predilection for frankfurters or flapjack.

Ev'rything about you is served up as cyber stew,

to calculate how likely you will lots of trouble brew.

And if they see a red flag on their little dashboard screen,

they'll taser you for jaywalking or punch you in the spleen.

The cops know all about you, or at least they think they do;

and chances are they'll treat you like some scofflaw bugaboo. 

So better fix your credit score and fix those traffic fines;

otherwise you'll wind up in the county jail's confines. 

Campaign Advertising

From the Wall Street Journal:  "Political revenue is expected to jump 150% this year from last at KCRG in Cedar Rapids, the top-ranked station in the second-largest media market in Iowa, according to national sales manager Steve Lake. Larger Des Moines stations are expecting an overall revenue increase of as much as 25% from last year . . ."

If you own a TV station you're on Easy Street;

the gravy train is bringing you a monetary treat.

PAC's and other sources from political campaigns

will see to it your advertising gives you luscious gains.

In Iowa especially, the troughs are full of swill;

you can charge a fortune when you're toting up the bill.

The money poured into a single solitary ad

is enough to feed for years the folks in Trinidad.

The poor and needy multiply each year, as does the bread

of special int'rests who intend to get inside your head!

Your Car is Bugged!

From the Wall Street Journal:  "Progressive, Allstate Corp. and State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Co. are promoting plug-in devices and/or smartphone applications, as well as cutting deals to piggyback on auto makers’ in-car computers, all in hopes of getting sensors into cars."

When you're in your car alone, you're not alone a bit;

State Farm next to you will also slyly, calmly sit.

Now your rear view mirror is a camcorder, you know --

telling Allstate if you're driving way too fast or slow.

Do not drink a beer before you get behind the wheel;

Progressive tests the air around you with excessive zeal.

Whether in a Lexus or a stripped down old Chevy,

your privacy is compromised each time you turn the key.

from the dadsterT

Hey there, Madel Padel;

Here's hoping everything is hunky-dory with you guys. I don't seem to hear about anyone in the family lately, probably because I don't get to see Sarah every week when she brings Ohen over for piano lessons at Pam's house.

I've got a big pile of dirty dishes in the sink, which I meant to get to right after Church today -- but then I thought, no -- let's write to Madel first (and maybe the dishes will do themselves).

I'm now in the North Park Second Ward -- it's about four blocks from my place, so an easy walk. It's not a very welcoming ward, so far.I guess maybe it's the demographics -- lots of people moving in and out.  It's full to bursting with either newly wed BYU students or old fossils from the several Senior apartment buildings in the neighborhood. They had to open up the cultural hall just to seat everyone for Sacrament Meeting, and they ran out of the Sacrament water and had to bless several more trays. I'm thinking this is a ward that will soon be split.
The ward has its share of oddballs, to say the least. There were 2 old geezers sitting right behind me who kept their cell phones on during Sacrament meeting, and kept getting calls, which they couldn't figure out how to answer. The same thing happened in High Priests group -- in fact, just as we finished the lesson (which was all about being sensitive to the needs of others) and the closing prayer was being said one of the old dodos' phones rang again and he just talked right through the prayer. I wanted to say something to the guy, but figured I'd let the authorities take care of the problem.
There seem to be several 'street people' in the ward -- they certainly dress the part; dirty sweat pants and hoodies. They were pretty disruptive during the Gospel Doctrine class -- wanting to make long, rambling comments about nothing in particular. One of them wears 2 pairs of glasses at the same time and still can't see very well. He kept coming up to me between meetings to shake my hand and breath on me.
But I guess I'm just being hypercritical, aren't I?
My apartment neighbors are interesting, too. The one on my left has a vicious little Chihuahua, even though there are big signs posted throughout the building that read NO PETS ALLOWED IN BUILDING. Her foot is in a cast, so I asked her what happened; she said she fell out of a second story window. I didn't pursue the subject with her. On the other side is a shriveled up old lady with loose dentures -- they clack like castanets every time  she speaks.
But I must say I've got a great view of the mountains from my ground floor patio. I can watch the sun rise and set over Y Mountain.
Sarah got me a great set of sheets for my bed -- they're so silky, I've never had anything like them. And Virginia got me a nice soft and downy quilt for the bed. I haven't enjoyed sleeping so much in years. In fact, this morning I slept in until 8! I haven't done that since I was in my 30's. (Church doesn't start until 12:30).
I've reserved the Community Room tomorrow evening for a big thank you dinner for everyone in my old ward who helped me out so much during the past 3 years. I'm making all Thai food -- a green papaya salad, a ramen noodles salad, red and green curry, and baked chicken in peanut sauce with plums. I don't know how many will show up -- probably about ten people.
Since the Provo Rec Center is now so close I go over every morning right after waking up; there's always an aquatics class -- aerobic or Zumba. Then I soak in the hot tub and then go over to the Library to dink around for a while until lunchtime, which I eat at the Senior Center, which is part of the Rec Center, and then I go home and read or write. I've just discovered the DiscWorld series by Terry Pratchett. They're great, and there's 21 of 'em, so I've got a lot of good reading ahead of me.